NSW Selective Writing Test Examples — Annotated Sample Essays by Genre
One of the hardest parts of preparing for the selective writing test is knowing what a strong response actually looks like. Most students practise by writing essay after essay without ever seeing an example of what markers reward. This guide gives you annotated samples across every major genre, with specific commentary on what works, what doesn't, and what separates an average response from a high-band one.
Every example below is based on the kind of prompts that appear in the NSW Selective High School Placement Test. The annotations explain exactly why certain choices score well.
How the writing test is scored
Before looking at examples, it helps to understand the five criteria markers use:
- Structure and organisation — Does the piece have a clear beginning, middle, and end? Are paragraphs used effectively?
- Language and vocabulary — Is the word choice varied and precise? Does the student avoid repetition?
- Grammar, spelling, and punctuation — Are sentences correctly constructed? Are there spelling errors?
- Genre conventions — Does the piece follow the rules of the assigned genre? A diary entry should read like a diary, not a story.
- Creativity, effectiveness, and voice — Does the writing engage the reader? Is there a distinct voice or original thinking?
Each criterion is scored on a scale. The total writing score contributes approximately 25% of the overall selective test result.
Narrative / Creative Writing Example
Prompt: *Write a story that begins with: "The door had always been locked, but today it was open."*
Average Band Response
The door had always been locked, but today it was open. I went inside and it was dark. There were lots of old things everywhere like boxes and old furniture. I was scared but I kept going. Then I found a treasure chest. I opened it and there was gold inside. I was so happy. I took the gold home and showed my mum. She was shocked. We were rich now. The end.
Why this scores in the average band:
- The plot exists but it's predictable: door → dark room → treasure → happy ending
- Almost no sensory detail. "It was dark" and "lots of old things" don't help the reader see anything
- No emotional depth. "I was scared" tells us the feeling instead of showing it
- "The end" is not needed and signals to the marker that the student doesn't know how to close a story
- Short, simple sentences throughout with no variation in length or structure
High Band Response
The door had always been locked, but today it was open.
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I noticed it on my way to school — just a crack, barely enough to see through, but enough to make me stop. The brass handle, green with age, hung at an angle as if someone had forced it from inside. I pressed my palm against the wood. It was cold, even though the morning sun had been warming everything else on the street for hours.
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Inside, the air smelled like dust and something older — like the pages of a book left in a shed for years. My eyes adjusted slowly. Shapes emerged: a workbench, shelves lined with glass jars, a chair with one leg shorter than the others. On the bench, arranged with unsettling precision, were seven envelopes. Each one had a name written on it in neat blue ink. The third one had mine.
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My fingers trembled as I picked it up. The envelope was sealed with red wax, and when I cracked it open, a single sentence was written on the card inside: *You were always going to find this.*
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I read it three times. Each time it felt less like a message and more like a warning. I put the card in my pocket, walked back into the sunlight, and pulled the door shut behind me. The lock clicked on its own.
Why this scores in the high band:
- Opening hook: Doesn't waste the first sentence. Immediately follows the prompt with a specific, visual detail ("just a crack, barely enough to see through")
- Sensory language: The reader can feel the cold handle, smell the dust, see the glass jars. Every detail serves the atmosphere
- Show, don't tell: Instead of "I was scared," the writer uses "my fingers trembled." The fear is shown through a physical action
- Mystery and restraint: The story doesn't explain everything. The seven envelopes, the message, the lock clicking on its own — these create questions the reader wants answered. Markers reward writing that trusts the reader's imagination
- Sentence variety: Short sentences ("The third one had mine.") sit alongside longer descriptive ones. This rhythm keeps the reader engaged
- Strong ending: The door locking on its own is a satisfying, slightly unsettling close. It mirrors the opening without repeating it
Persuasive Writing Example
Prompt: *Write a persuasive piece arguing that students should be allowed to use mobile phones during lunch breaks at school.*
Average Band Response
I think students should be allowed to use phones at lunch. Firstly, phones are useful because you can call your parents if you need to. Secondly, everyone has a phone anyway so why ban them. Thirdly, it's not fair that teachers can use their phones but students can't. In conclusion, students should be allowed to use phones at lunch because it's our right and it's not fair to take them away.
Why this scores in the average band:
- Uses "firstly, secondly, thirdly" structure which is formulaic and predictable
- Arguments are surface-level: "everyone has one" and "it's not fair" don't develop into anything deeper
- No evidence, examples, or reasoning beyond the initial claim
- No counterargument addressed
- "It's our right" is asserted without justification
High Band Response
Every lunch break, 400 students at our school sit in the playground with their phones locked inside their bags. Meanwhile, in schools across Japan, Finland, and parts of the United States, students use their devices during breaks to message family, check homework deadlines, and listen to music. These schools haven't fallen apart. If anything, trusting students with responsibility has made them more responsible.
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The most common argument against phones at lunch is distraction. But distraction during lunch isn't the same as distraction during class. Lunch is unstructured time. Students already spend it talking, playing, and doing nothing in particular. Allowing phone use during this time doesn't take anything away from learning — it simply gives students one more option for how they spend their free time.
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There is also a practical benefit that schools rarely acknowledge. Students with medical conditions, family responsibilities, or anxiety about after-school arrangements often need to contact a parent during the day. Currently, they must queue at the office and explain their situation to a staff member. A quick text message during lunch would solve the problem in seconds, with far less disruption.
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Critics will argue that phones lead to cyberbullying. This is a real concern, but banning phones doesn't eliminate online bullying — it just moves it to after school hours, where there is no teacher supervision at all. A better approach is to allow supervised phone use and teach students how to navigate digital interactions safely.
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Trusting students with limited phone access during breaks sends a clear message: we believe you can make good choices. That message matters more than any blanket rule.
Why this scores in the high band:
- Opens with a scene, not a thesis. The first sentence creates a picture. The reader is drawn in before the argument begins
- Uses international examples. Mentioning Japan, Finland, and the US gives the argument credibility and breadth, even though the student hasn't cited specific studies
- Addresses counterarguments directly. The distraction argument and the cyberbullying argument are both raised and refuted. This is the single most important technique in persuasive writing for the selective test
- Practical reasoning. The paragraph about students with medical conditions is specific and human. It moves the argument from abstract fairness to real-world impact
- Closing with principle, not repetition. The final sentence makes a broader point about trust instead of simply restating the thesis
Diary Entry Example
Prompt: *You just moved to a new school and today was your first day. Write a diary entry about the experience.*
Average Band Response
Dear Diary, today was my first day at my new school. I was very nervous. I walked in and everyone stared at me. I sat next to a girl called Sarah. She was nice. At lunch I sat alone but then Sarah came and sat with me. The teachers were okay. I miss my old school but hopefully it will get better.
Why this scores in the average band:
- Events are listed without emotional depth. "I was very nervous" tells us the emotion but doesn't explore it
- No specific sensory or physical details — we don't know what the school looks like, sounds like, or feels like
- Reads more like a summary than a diary entry. A diary is where you process feelings, not just record facts
- Very short with no reflection or inner thoughts
High Band Response
Monday, 10 March
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I told Mum I was fine when she dropped me off. I wasn't.
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The gates were bigger than my old school's. Everything was bigger — the buildings, the playground, even the bins. I walked through the front entrance holding my bag straps so tight my knuckles went white. A teacher pointed me towards Room 14 and said, "You'll love it here." I smiled and nodded because that's what you do when adults say things like that.
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Everyone already had their groups. You could see it the moment you walked in — clusters of desks pushed together, inside jokes written on pencil cases, best friends saving seats. I sat in the only empty chair, which was right at the front. Nobody said anything. I opened my pencil case and pretended to organise it so I'd have something to do with my hands.
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At lunch, a girl called Priya asked if I wanted to sit with her. I said yes so fast it probably sounded desperate. She talked about her dog and her older brother and how the canteen sushi is actually decent. I didn't say much. I just sat there feeling grateful that someone had noticed I existed.
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The walk home felt longer than it should have. I kept replaying things — did I laugh too loud in English? Did people think it was weird that I didn't talk at lunch? Mum asked how it went and I said "good," which is the word you use when you don't know how to explain something yet.
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I think it will be okay. Not yet. But eventually.
Why this scores in the high band:
- Authentic voice. "I smiled and nodded because that's what you do when adults say things like that" sounds exactly like a real person thinking on paper. This is what markers mean by "voice"
- Showing vulnerability. "I said yes so fast it probably sounded desperate" — this kind of honest self-awareness is rare in student writing and markers notice it immediately
- Physical details that carry emotion. "Holding my bag straps so tight my knuckles went white" tells us the character is nervous without saying the word "nervous"
- Reflection, not just events. The walk home paragraph — replaying the day, overthinking — is what a diary entry is actually for. This is the section that separates a diary from a recount
- Strong closing. "Not yet. But eventually." is short, honest, and emotionally resonant. It doesn't wrap everything up neatly, which is more realistic and more mature
News Report Example
Prompt: *A student at your school has raised $10,000 for charity by running a marathon. Write a news report about the achievement.*
Average Band Response
A student at Riverside Primary School has raised $10,000 for charity. Jake Smith ran a marathon last weekend and lots of people donated money. He trained for 3 months. The money will go to the Children's Hospital. Jake said he was tired but happy. The school is very proud of him.
Why this scores in the average band:
- Covers the basic facts but reads like a list of dot points
- No direct quotes formatted properly
- No structure beyond a single paragraph
- Doesn't answer "why" — what motivated Jake? Why this charity?
- No forward-looking statement or broader significance
High Band Response
Local Student Raises $10,000 in Solo Marathon for Children's Hospital
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A Year 6 student at Riverside Primary School has raised more than $10,000 for Sydney Children's Hospital after completing a full 42-kilometre marathon last Saturday. Jake Smith, 11, ran the Bankstown Community Marathon in just under five hours, finishing to a crowd of cheering classmates, teachers, and family members.
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Smith began training three months ago after visiting the hospital with his younger sister, who was treated there for asthma complications last year. "I saw how hard the nurses worked and I wanted to do something," he said. "Running was the only thing I could think of that people would actually sponsor."
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The fundraising total surpassed its original $2,000 target within the first week, driven largely by social media posts shared by parents at the school. Donations came from across the local community, with several local businesses contributing matched amounts.
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Principal Maria Gonzalez said the achievement reflected the school's values. "Jake didn't just raise money — he showed every student here that one person really can make a difference," she said. The school plans to hold a special assembly on Friday to recognise his effort.
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Smith has already set his sights on next year. "I want to do a triathlon," he said, grinning. "But maybe I'll train for longer this time."
Why this scores in the high band:
- Headline. A proper news headline that summarises the story in one line. Many students forget this — it's an easy mark
- Lead paragraph answers the 5Ws. Who (Jake Smith), What (raised $10,000), When (last Saturday), Where (Bankstown Community Marathon), Why (for the Children's Hospital) — all in the first paragraph
- Multiple quotes from different sources. Jake and the principal both speak. Two voices make the report feel balanced and real
- Human motivation. The detail about his sister being treated at the hospital gives the story emotional weight without being sentimental
- Forward-looking close. Jake wanting to do a triathlon next year ends the report on an upbeat, forward-looking note — exactly how professional news articles close
Article Writing Example
Prompt: *Write an article for a school magazine about the benefits of reading for fun.*
Average Band Response
Reading is very good for you. It helps your brain and makes you smarter. Reading also helps with spelling and vocabulary. Many studies show that reading is beneficial. If you read every day you will do better in school. Everyone should try to read more books because it is good for your education.
Why this scores in the average band:
- Every sentence makes the same point: reading is good
- No examples, anecdotes, or specific evidence
- "Many studies show" without naming any is an empty claim
- No structure — just one paragraph repeating the thesis
- No engaging opening or strong conclusion
High Band Response
Why the Smartest People You Know Probably Read for Fun
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Here is something no teacher will tell you: the students who consistently score highest in English, History, and even Science are almost always the ones who read outside of school. Not because they were forced to, but because somewhere along the way, they found a book that made them forget they were reading at all.
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Reading for pleasure does something that study cannot. It builds vocabulary without flashcards, improves sentence structure without grammar drills, and develops empathy by letting you live inside someone else's mind for a few hundred pages. A student who has read widely will instinctively know that "the house was old" is weaker than "the house sagged under the weight of its own roof" — not because they memorised a rule, but because they have read thousands of sentences and absorbed what good writing feels like.
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The practical benefits are well documented. Students who read for 20 minutes a day outside school are exposed to approximately 1.8 million words per year. That exposure translates directly into spelling accuracy, reading speed, and comprehension scores. But the less measurable benefit might matter more: readers develop the ability to concentrate for sustained periods, which is exactly the skill the selective writing test demands when it gives you 30 minutes and a blank page.
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The most common excuse is time. Between homework, tutoring, sport, and screens, reading feels like one more task on an already full list. But reading doesn't need to compete with those things — it can replace the 20 minutes of scrolling that happens before bed. Swap the screen for a book, and within a month, you will notice the difference in your writing.
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If you don't know where to start, ask a friend what they are reading, or browse the school library without a plan. The goal isn't to find an "educational" book. It's to find one you can't put down. Everything else follows from that.
Why this scores in the high band:
- Engaging headline. "Why the Smartest People You Know Probably Read for Fun" is specific and creates curiosity
- Conversational authority. "Here is something no teacher will tell you" hooks the reader immediately. The tone is confident without being arrogant
- Concrete example. Comparing "the house was old" with "the house sagged under the weight of its own roof" demonstrates the point rather than just stating it
- Specific statistic. "1.8 million words per year" adds credibility. Even in a school magazine article, one number makes the argument feel researched
- Addresses the counterargument. The time excuse is raised and practically solved. This shows mature reasoning
- Actionable closing. The reader knows exactly what to do: ask a friend, browse the library, swap screen time. The article doesn't just inform — it moves the reader to act
Key Takeaways Across All Genres
What every high-band response has in common:
- Opens with something specific, not a general statement
- Shows instead of tells — emotions come through actions and details, not labels
- Uses varied sentence lengths — short sentences for impact, longer ones for description
- Addresses the genre's conventions (quotes in news reports, reflection in diary entries, counterarguments in persuasive writing)
- Ends with purpose, not repetition
What every average-band response has in common:
- Opens with a flat restatement of the prompt
- Tells the reader how to feel instead of showing it
- Uses simple, repetitive sentence structures
- Misses genre-specific elements
- Ends abruptly or with "The end" / "In conclusion" followed by a restatement
The difference between average and high band is not talent — it is technique. Every pattern above can be learned and practised.
Frequently Asked Questions
Can I use these examples as templates?
These examples demonstrate technique, not content. You should not memorise or copy them. Instead, study what each one does well — the specific techniques, sentence structures, and genre conventions — and apply those principles to whatever prompt you receive. Markers can tell when writing is rehearsed.
How long should my selective writing test response be?
There is no fixed word count, but most high-band responses fall between 350 and 500 words. Quality matters far more than length. A focused, well-written 350-word response will outscore a rushed, repetitive 600-word one. Use your 30 minutes wisely: 5 minutes planning, 20 minutes writing, 5 minutes proofreading.
What genre will appear in the 2026 test?
The NSW Selective test can assign any genre. Common genres include creative/narrative, persuasive, diary entry, news report, article, and letter writing. You will not know the genre in advance, which is why practising across all genres is essential.
What is the most common mistake students make?
Telling instead of showing. "I was scared" is telling. "My hands wouldn't stop shaking and I could hear my own breathing" is showing. This single technique — converting emotions into physical details — is the fastest way to improve your score across every genre.
How do I know if my writing is high band or average band?
Compare your writing to the examples above. If your opening restates the prompt, your sentences are all the same length, and your ending repeats your introduction, you are likely in the average band. If your opening hooks the reader, your details are specific and sensory, and your ending adds something new, you are approaching the high band. The best way to get an objective assessment is to submit your writing for AI feedback or request an expert review.